There must be a god

…because fate itself could not be so cruel.

That’s kinda harsh, but pure science means that things happen in an almost random sense. Like me missing my final that I thought was scheduled at 1:30 but in fact was at 8:00. It’s amazing, I blame it on the fact that all my other finals were at 1:30 and just subconsciously assumed. The more amazing part is that Elizabeth assumed hers was at 1:30 and it was at 10:30. That’s just weird. Luckily, her professor let her send in the essays they were going to do and all should be fine. After much depression I heard back from my professor and I get to take mine at 80%. Which, in all honesty, is still going to hurt. I should go on about how the easier the class is the worse I do, but I don’t feel like it.

So finals went poorly, made people hate me at SRA, my computer might have a virus (but it doesn’t look like it), I have to take a sunday final and couldn’t party with the others, I feel like I’ve lost my ability to be optimisitc, I think the childlike dreams that I had are almost completely ruined, I have to spend a sufficient amount of money in a few days for a lease, I’ve gotten sick in my head and my stomach, then got sick in my chest region (heart) and now I just don’t know anymore. Everything seems to go wrong at the same time (hence the opening line.)

I know I have the same problems as everyone else and that’s why I usually just ignore it and go on with life. I’m just being forced to evaluate the situation right now, so I am, but coming to the same inconclusive results.

All I know is chipotle can bring happiness to a sad tummy.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I–
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

-Robert Frost

shatter the clouds of despair

  1. I love that poem. It was one of the first I could remember. Less worry. More happy. As I should eat my words. It will be fine Rich, I have faith in you.

  2. Everyday I believe a little more in a higher power. It must have been some kind of test (figuratively and literally) and I think I passed. I passed my class and not just by scraping the bottom of the barrel. Things are fine with the heart and my illness is going away. I still don’t know where this path of life will lead me, but whatever the choice is I know that love is the only currency accepted at the end.

  3. Something that was mentioned in church yesterday: To mold us, we often must become broken first. Sounds like it fits. Countdown to starwars: 3

  4. you should come to Sonshine!

  5. It’s sad to know my brother is having problems. Like, my whole life I always thought that nothing could phase you. You always seem so immune to problems that bother most people. I hope that your final goes well enough to keep the parental units off your back. If nothing else, I’ll treat you to Cold Stone this weekend. Like Chipotle, that should make you feel better.

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